funny status messages

 


Last post by sirdawko on 06/12/2016 09:59:16 AM GMT
  • funny You should treat your women the way you treat your vacuum cleaner.. When it stops sucking, change the bag!
    Posted by funny  06/08/2015 06:09 PM  6 Like
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  • funny I'm sick of people knocking on my door looking for donations..... Just had a woman from the sperm bank..Boy, did I give her a mouthful..
    Posted by funny  06/08/2015 03:33 AM  3 Like
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  • King A cop just killed my GTA V character even though he's white. Anyone else experiencing this bug?
    Posted by King  20/05/2015 01:15 AM  7 Like
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  • sirdawko. Be careful when looking for your knight in shining armour that you don't end up with a c*nt in tin foil.
    Posted by sirdawko.  29/04/2015 05:46 PM  7 Like
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  • sirdawko Today ,a feminist asked me how I view lesbian relationships.....apparently "In HD" was not the right answer!
    Posted by sirdawko  30/03/2015 10:14 AM  7 Like
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  • TisMe Went 2 the shop today and before I left my friend asked me 2 buy something 2 make her smell nice. Apparently Vagisil isn't what she meant
    Posted by TisMe  15/12/2014 09:00 AM  6 Like
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  • TisMe What does a dog and a tree have in common? When they're both dead they both lose their bark.
    Posted by TisMe  26/11/2014 08:36 AM  7 Like
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  • CAMALOT My lesbian neighbours got me a rolex for my birthday . I think they misunderstood me when i said i wanna watch !
    Posted by CAMALOT  14/11/2014 10:04 AM  7 Like
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  • TisMe I'm not saying I hate David Cameron or anything, but, if I had a glass of water and he was on fire; I'd glass him...
    Posted by TisMe  28/08/2014 07:56 PM  7 Like
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  • sirdawko My wife refused to have sex with me after I got 2 temporary tattoos.......So I rubbed one off.
    Posted by sirdawko  25/08/2014 08:02 AM  3 Like
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  • TisMe Police have removed a large amount of material from Cliff Richards home... Lets hope it's just child porn and NOT new music!!
    Posted by TisMe  15/08/2014 08:17 AM  7 Like
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